The First And Worst Record

by Shit Hits The Fan

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Intro 00:34
(No words)
Redshirt 03:09
Don’t you wonder why you always fucking die? Nothing to say, so it’s all completely right You don’t have much words in this film So it really doesn’t matter if you’re gonna get killed Redshirt, first one to die Someone has to be the sacrifice Redshirt, first one to die The guy who has to give his life So this character hasn’t got much to say Then he’s gonna die most certainly Well, man, I’m sorry But you’re the redshirt in this story
Police canceled the punk rock show So you went to the streets, the way to go You set someone’s car on fire Burned it down right to the wire Someone lives in that house over there But you break the windows cuz you don’t care You think you think that’s really punk? You’re nothing but a dumb little fuck I hope you die in a cesspit You’re nothing but a piece of shit I hope you die in a cesspit You’re nothing but a hypocrite
You dyed your hair and wear your sisters pants Then you cry in a corner cause no one understands Dress like a clown is a great invention So why cry about the negative attention? All the time those constant whines about how your life sucks When will you realize that no one in the world gives a fuck? Ban the emo scene We’ve got to ban the Ban the emo scene We’ve got to ban the Ban the emo scene We’ve got to ban the And them fucking kill them all Now you slit your wrists because you wanted to die But it didn’t turn out well cause you’re still alive Give me your hand and take this gun It’s gonna be an advantage for everyone The world is gonna be a better place If we erase the emo’s from the human race If you agree with me come sing along Because being emo is just fucking wrong
My mother caught me masturbating She told my crush and now she hates me At school the girls think I’m a creep I think it’s them for them to see I’m not ashamed of it So why don’t we just admit that Pulling dick is nice Spank your monkey twice I don’t mind if anyone sees That my pants are hanging down my knees Pulling dick is nice Spank your monkey twice Why is it such a taboo? It’s what men are supposed to do My sister found my porn collection And she asked me what’s wrong with me I said I need to cause erection In times of desperate need No need for hesitation Time for global masturbation
Lyrics 01:35
Our singer He won’t sing The lyrics We wrote He says they’re too soft It’s not punk enough Our lyrics should be Violent and rough Whoo hoho wooooo hoho ho Our singer He won’t sing The lyrics We wrote Everything we wrote sucks The songs don’t include enough fucks Not enough shits, faggs and whores Are placed in chorus
Why does music today all sound the same? Adapt to popularity to try to make a name Change your image and polish your sound Well, I’m sure your fans must be proud Music today seems to be More and more attached to the mainstream And why do only few know That songs shouldn’t be a bridge too narrow Keep on making shit nobody wants to hear I’m not sure how long I can bear The quality of music is going down Something’s gotta change now
The only thing I know, is that I don’t know nothing at all And as far as I’m concerned, the system’s gonna fall Empty fucking words, our government’s a curse Smoke and mirrors, makebelieve, when will anyone see They don’t give a fuck about society They don’t give a shit about you Saving themselves is all they want to do The government has lost, lost all control Government – smoke and mirrors Government – a makebelieve Government – we must attack And then take all the power back Where did all the money go? I’m sure the politicians know It’s right in their pockets “In these times we all lose” What a fucking beautiful excuse Because my money is right there in your pockets
I threw a party at my house Invited friends, my band, some more Suddenly you knocked on my door Shouting “I’m here for the booze and whores” I should’ve known it’s not okay But I let you in anyway Cause I’m a nice guy And sometimes I am wondering why At the moment you were in You took my bottle of gin Made out with a random teen You’re the biggest loser I’ve ever seen Uninvited guest You better clean up that mess Uninvited guest Or I’m going to kick your ass You drank all the liquor and the booze Twice you spilled your drink, no more Opened the fridge and ate my food Then you puked right in the sink What the fuck is wrong with you? Not sure what I am going to do Stab your balls or break your neck When I’m about to snap You fucked someone else in my bedroom Yeah, we noticed, you didn’t close the door You left the condom under my pillow and then you fell asleep on the floor Fucking things up like that isn’t the way to go. Follow and I will show you the front door
Old People 03:55
I was walking down the street Life flashed before my eyes when two seniors took a little ride They were driving towards me Death is all I could see Cause old people can’t drive and surely make you die I could get away I was able to survive But they were still on the road and taking people’s lives When they shut the door fifty people were no more Our lives are at risk and they just don’t notice Old people can’t park Old people can’t drive Deaf and blind but they don’t mind, we must unite We’ve got to make sure We’ve got to find a way To keep the old people at bay Old people, don’t let them drive Take their license away if you want to stay alive Old people, take their license away Wouldn’t it be great if the streets would be save There is one simple way to keep the old people away Ban them of the streets Take their license real hard Make sure they will never be able to drive Millions of people would still be alive If we didn’t let old people drive Put a senior behind the wheel And a massacre will reveal
My mother tells me I should do the dishes You want fries with that? My boss asks me if I can work till late You want fries with that? My girlfriend says I should shave my sack You want fries with that? People never seem, seem to understand I don’t want to do the things they ask If anybody says or tells me what to do. They can just leave, go home, fuck you People never seem, seem to understand I don’t want to do the things they ask Gotta live for myself. Instead for someone else because life is lame if you live like a slave My teacher tells me I should do my homework You want fries with that? My dad asks me if I can bring him some beer You want fries with that? My girlfriend wanted to grow my dick You want fries with that? Need some fastfood when I’m upset I order a burger cause I need a snack But then I became so fucking mad When she asked me if I wanted some fries with that Don’t need you fries Don’t need your shit If I wanted fries I would have said it McDonalds asks me if I want some fries I don’t want your fries Burger King asks me if I want some fries I don’t want your fries Your mother asks me if I want some fries I don’t want your fries
I live in a dreamworld of happiness and peace An euforic state of mind is all I please The limits of color is all I want to see While floating on the river of serenity Unicorns and rainbows Are always on my mind Green fields and blue skies Make me feel alright Let’s take another ride on cloud nine The wind blows softly and the sun will always shine On the mountain of elation is where I stand When we are walking hand in hand


"Rien City’s finest punk rock band’s long awaited first and worst full-length album. Featuring twelve social critical and tongue-in-cheek songs that are actually not that bad at all!"

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released September 21, 2013

All music and lyrics by Shit Hits The Fan
Recorded at Rien City Studio's, Rien - summer 2013
Drums recorded at Studio Hitfabryk, Gytsjerk.
Mixed and mastered by Douwe Booij at Sound Paradigm Productions.

Bram de Vries - Vocals
Jouke Rispens - Guitar
Steve Erwin - Bass
Douwe Booij - Drums

Shit Hits The Fan - 'The First And Worst Record'
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